The Importance of Healing
November 11, 2024
For a long time, I thought therapy was a waste of time—a cliché rooted in western culture. By the time I reached my mid-20s and moved into my 30s, I was struggling with so much pent-up emotion. Random outbursts of anger and sudden waves of sadness became a regular part of my life. I didn’t know how to express my feelings properly without first reaching a state of frustration. The mere idea of therapy became this looming cloud of insecurity. Questions plagued my mind: “Am I really that broken that I need someone’s help?” “Does seeking therapy mean I’m weak?” “I’ve made it this far on my own—why would I need anyone now?”
Asking for help was never something I could do. Even when I was homeless, those around me had no idea. Asking for help had become a sign of weakness. I felt I had to do things for myself, prove to everyone that I made the right choices, and if I didn’t, the consequences were mine and mine alone. Growing up, asking for help often led to trouble, so I learned early in life to keep quiet and move in silence.
This mentality was so ingrained in my being. My wife would suggest therapy from time to time, but I always shut it down. I had tried it twice before and hated it, never lasting beyond a free session.
Then came an emotional outburst that left me feeling everything inside me shutting down. I was constantly sick, both physically and mentally. My health problems were the worst they’d ever been. Out of desperation, I started searching for “cheap therapy” in my local city and found what was called sliding scale therapy, where therapists offer sessions at a discounted rate.
This is where I met my therapist, Julia. A young and vibrant woman who, behind her bubbly personality, was able to connect with me immediately. I felt… safe. A word I hadn’t used in a very long time. For the first time in a while, I felt like I could communicate.
With each session, I began to understand more about myself. The complexities that came with this introspection were guided by Julia. I would talk, and she would listen. Here’s the thing: I realize now that what makes an amazing therapist isn’t just the words they say, but the words they help you find within yourself. An amazing therapist guides the patient to a better understanding of themselves. Healing wasn’t about Julia fixing me—it was about me recognizing every broken part of myself, accepting that they’re all a part of who I am, and learning to love myself again. Learning that I matter too. That was healing.
Healing has given me a second chance at life. What was once broken by animosity and sadness is slowly being mended by acceptance and love. I had to heal in order to heal the relationships around me. I may not be perfect, but I am so much better than when I first started.
In May of 2022, I walked into the offices of Exhale Therapy, feeling defeated and embarrassed that I needed help. Today, on November 9th, 2024, much of what once fuelled my sadness and anger has dissipated into mere memories of the past. I am the happiest I have ever been. I have a better understanding of my life, and I can finally be the man that the people who love me need me to be.
This post is dedicated to all those who need a push. Therapy doesn’t make you weak; it means you care enough to seek strength for yourself and those you love. Heal yourself so that you can help heal others. Life isn’t easy and never will be, but it is filled with people who make it worthwhile. Let’s live and enjoy life together.
Thank you, Exhale Therapy, and thank you, Julia. You have no idea how much you’ve done for me. You’ve given me back what I lost and longed for. You’ve given me a better understanding of myself when I thought I was just an angry, lost man ready to destroy everything. Thank you for giving my parents, my wife, my family, and my two little girls the man they needed. I could thank you forever, but I’ll just have to remind you every session we have.
Written and Shared by: Da Neng Vang
Original Source: Serendipity The Calm in Complete Chaos